All Star Batman Episode 9 Review

Writer:Frank Miller
Art: Jim Lee and Scott Williams

Synopsis: Now for all you who read or follow All-Star Batman you will understand how that image above is a segway to the review. For those of you who don't, read an issue and you'll know the key freeze that makes this segway work. I also love Law and Order, the one on TNT they show all the time with Jack McCoy still as ADA who was hot AADA's. On another sidenote, the dude who plays the new ADA played Thomas Wayne in Batman Begins, it's all connected (silence as I prepare for the actual review). The Goddamn Batman is facing off with Hal "the man" Jordan. He happens to be completely yellow. Hal wants to talk and Batman is totally ripping him mentally with some moments such as Hal's brain being a potato, him not being able to keep a secret identity, and just the concept that the man can't take down anything yellow (the almighty banana is powerful weapon for dispatching Green Lanterns). We get a flashback of Robin painting everything yellow including a little story about how quitting 8 times. Hal is trying to convince the Goddamn Batman to tone it down, take it down a notch. The Goddamn Batman takes a sip of lemonade (being prepared for anything) and offers some to Hal. Hal calls out his image to which he responds I dress like a Goddamn bat, of course I scare people (makes sense). Hal is getting frustrated and punches the Goddamn Batman. This is where the true story begins, the lemonade is following and Robin steps up the challenge. He catches the glass and manages to refill it before anymore harm is done. Hal then yells about the kidnapping of the Grayson kid and how he dressed him up. The Goddamn Batman feeds him some BS that Dick Grayson was in a trauma clinic all this time and Hal buys it (potato, remember). Hal asks for an explanation and the Goddamn Batman is about to tell him a fantastic story that stretches the imagination to the limit but decides against it. Robin had swiped Hal's ring and he tries to get it back but Robin just fucks him up. He practically crushes Hal's wind pipe before the Goddamn Batman takes him out and puts Robin out for the count. He takes off his mask and manages to save Hal's life. Robin thinks to himself how much he enjoyed beating up Hal and his boss is thinking how he fucked up with Robin. They ride to the cemetery and share a moment as Robin grieves for his parents.

Comments: First, you will get an award if you can tell me how many times I said goddamn in this review. This was a hilarious issue full of great comedy. To star off superficially, the art was fantastic. Jim Lee is the best at what he does which seems to be draw All Star Batman. Frank Miller's Goddamn Batman is excellent. It is one of the best series to read. Sometimes you forget that comics are meant to be fun but this is an excellent reminder. His take on Batman is the perfect change of pace you need sometimes. The Goddamn Batman is one of the best characters in comments. He has no regard for anyone but himself, Alfred, and Robin. He isn't afraid to take shot at someone. He has a well establish history of fucking with Superman but Miller opened up the playbook and took shots at Wonder Woman (Lesbian witch), the retarded stretchy guy, and even Hal Jordan. The ending of those issue was phenomenal, even though this comic is all fun that moment was extremely nice. It didn't seem forced at all and felt natural with the course of the story. Words can't do justice to this book, it is extremely fun and will have you laughing at loud at the Goddamn Batman and his antics. This issue easily gets a


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Daredevil #105 Review

Without Fear (Finale)
Writer: Ed Brubaker
Art: Michael Lark

Summary:
We start with Matt on top of a building, and heads for Hell's Kitchen. We go to the Kitchen, and Hood and Fear are talking. Hood bitches about how Fear set him up and stuff, and Fear tells him to get out of here because he wants to take Daredevil on by himself. Daredevil arrives. They fight on a rooftop. They just go at it, with Daredevil getting the better of him. Fear still wants to fight though. Daredevil knocks him off the building, and whips him into a room. We find out here that there is no cure to the fear gas. Cranston tells him that he needs him to tell the feds about what he has done. True to his word, Cranston confesses all to the feds. We go to Matt and Milla in some home, where Matt tells them to fix her. Matt talks to himself about how he has always known fear, and that he has ruined Milla's life. We see Cranston in prison. Somehow, everyone listens to what he says, even the guards. He then bangs some chick officer in a cell room. We then see Ox and Hood on a roof watching Matt. Hood says to let Daredevil think he won something.

Comments:
That was a great ending to the arc. Brubaker is a character genius. He does most of his psychological characterizations in Daredevil. The One and Only has claimed he doesn't like Daredevil because DD doesn't have villians. Well, just like Johns did to Sinestro, has turned Mr. Fear into a respectable archenemy for Matt Murdock. Fear did long term damage to Matt, and didn't get screwed over because he just owns prison. He is so advanced in the mind, that he can make people fear him without his gas. As for Matt, his life is pretty much ruined because his wife is screwed forever. This arc did some damage to the title (in a good way). The fight was really good, and i was very satisfied with this issue and this story arc.

Verdict:
OWN IT

Batman #674 Review

Written by: Grant Morrison
Art by: Tony Daniel, Jonathan Glapion
Cover by: Tony Daniel

Synopsis: Morrison has been on a hot streak and he continues this hot streak in this issue. He has stated in several interviews that this upcoming Batman RIP arch is the climax to the previous issues he has been writing. He says that this reads like a novel and this holds true. In the near future we (Sports God) are planning to discuss Morrison and what the various hints he has left as to the course of Batman. Anyway the issue kicks off with the fake Batman getting ready to torture the original Batman. He explains how he was part of an experiment conducted by Dr. Hurt to recreate Batman just in case the original bit the bullet. Batman blacks out and the fake shots an arrow into his hand. Batman continues to hallucinate about the isolation chamber as Bat-mite coaches him through everything. Back on the roof of GCPD, Gordon is recovering and demands to know what up? He asks that red head cop who clearly knows what up what the in the blue hell is going on. He proceeds to cock block him but finally caves and cops (pun) to the experiment. It turns it is conveniently taking place in the basement of this building. Meanwhile, the torture is still going on and Batman is beginning to figure out what is going on. The first two Batmen had failed because they didn't have the edge which is the trauma of losing a loved one. They had a satanic cult attack this one mans family which drove him to being the impostor Batman in question. Batman also reasons that his three Batmen dream was just a fail safe so he doesn't remember what actually went down. We get a brief snippet of what appears to be Dr. Hurt getting caught and most likely gunned down by the GCPD. The impostor Batman decides to stop playing games and goes to cut off Batman's hand. He cuts it but Batman had dislocated his shoulder so he cut nothing and then gets popped by Batman. He starts going to work on the impostor and doesn't kill him. The Venom Batman comes bursting through the wall and is getting ready to go Big Show on Batman when he gets his head blown off by that one cop (who ironically enough is a red head which is funny because as I type this the ginger episode of South Park is on TV, weird right, I know). He then blows the moment by trying a one liner. The cops surround Batman and it is all tense, Batman then disappears the old fashion way, smoke bomb. He is running down the impostor but he manages to get away. They have some conversation which is rather important. Batman reasons that this isn't happening randomly and believes a criminal is pulling all the strings. That being said it implies two things, if he can think one criminal of such caliber exists then it is a definite possibly he exists, and also if this criminal mastermind can fuck with Batman he probably is the biggest badass beast in all of DC. Bruce then proceeds to change back into his parachuting clothe and sneak into a trash can. He calls Alfred and tells him they are going to stage a scene to explain his absence.


Comments: This was just flat out the best comic of the week. It was the perfect lead in into Batman RIP. This issue really got me excited. One thing about Batman is even though his Rouges' gallery is legendary, there is no one to challenge him besides the Joker who is currently on another planet yet this issue strongly hinted at his comeback which will be discussed more in the article that is coming soon to a marvel-vs-dc blog near you. The art was amazing and it seems to fit this new surreal style that Morrison employs among this title. As for some speculation to who the new rouge is, I want to guess a supernatural enemy because there is the overarching theme of satanic worship from Batman #666 but also in the way the impostor Batman's family was killed. Morrison does an amazing job of telling us backstory and also progressing the issue. Most writers would just use this issue as all backstory but Morrison manages to give us both a backstory and progress the issue. I enjoy how Morrison is slowly showing us how Batman is losing it. For one thing we see how obsessed he is to a disturbing degree with fighting crime and being prepared. You don't really notice it during this issue that you should be disturbed by his paranoia and how damaged he is but Morrison manages to subtly point this out. In closing, Morrison is just killing it. We are watching a future absolute edition in the making. You have to dig his approach of basically writing about how Batman's demons are catching up with him. I can't wait for the climax of this epic which should just completely blow us away. Every several years we get a Batman epic and here it is, in all its glory. This issue gets

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Captain America #35 Review

The Death of Captain America (Act 2)- The Burden of Dreams (Part 5)
Writer: Ed Brubaker
Art: Butch Guice

Summary:
We start with Falcon telling Tony he found an abandoned warehouse where Faustus was recently. Tony tells Falcon that he and SHIELD are tied up at the moment, and can't send in squads to tear the warehouse apart. We go to the tube, and we see that a private defense company is securing American cities, because no one trusts the government after they shot protesters. We find that a Senator and Faustus are in cahoots. We go to a riot outside the White House, and Bucky and Natalia are there talking and scheming. Natalia is inside hacking, and Bucky is just hanging out. We find out that the private defense company is owned by the Kronas Company. They started the shooting so that they could use their own defense assets because no one would trust the government. We find that the crowd has been drugged to start a riot. A Kronas guy negotiates a deal with the Sec of Defense, and Alek is looking on. He tells Skull that he didn't want to negotiate, but Skull replies that they are beating capitalism and letting the towns burn and shit. We go back to Bucky, who says he has to stop the riot. He goes all Cap on their bitch asses. He takes them out with a mixture of sleeping gas, a shield, and some attitude. We go to Skull and Faustus. Skull congratulates Faustus for turning people against each other. Faustus said its no big deal. Skull tells him that they will keep a closer eye on Sharon. Back to Bucky. He is still kicking ass. Natalia finds a coptor on the roof of the Senator's building. Cap busts through the room and takes out a security guard. He then gets cornered by some chick with a gun and henchmen. We end the issue with Sharon being looked at by a robot.

Comments:
That was a great issue. Brubaker followed up very well from the last one, and Bucky is such a fucking g. The man is just all about kicking ass. He was pacing around at the beginning of the issue, looking all uncomfortable. Then he just knocked out like 30 people in like 6 pages. Brubaker does a great job of showing the political tension that is in this title. We have corruption and conspiracies all over the place. The art is tremendous. There is nothing bad to say about this title. I am still not sure where the whole Sharon pregnancy angle is going.

Verdict:
OWN IT

Countdown To Final Crisis #9 Review

Pay The Piper
Writer: Paul Dini
Art: Tom Derenick

Summary:
We start the issue with Piper and the crazy dude. Everyone is wiped out, but the dude awakens to tell Piper that he is a human form of the Anti-Life equation, and tells him to play his flute. An OMAC comes down and kills the crazy dude. We cut to a Monitor and Darkseid. Darkseid says that it ends on his terms. We go to Jason, who sees that the OMAC is carrying off Piper. He says that he is going to get off this hellhole. We see The Challengers and the Amazons going off to rescue Jason. The wierd dude is back. Lots of shit happens now. Red Robin got into the core, and fights a bunch of OMACS. He ends up freeing the imprisoned Firestorm, and the Challengers show up. There is a huge fight, Karate Kid is getting dissected by Eye, and more shit i can't even explain. Atom interrupts the dissection, but Eye already has the virus stored. Eye sends in more OMACS. Piper kills the wierd dude with a song, and then BLOWS UP EYE. Yeah. The faces are all knocked out, and about to die.

Comments:
Countdown to Final Crisis is rolling. We get a ton of action in this issue. I am kind of confused how the weird dude like survived the first time around, but that is a minor complaint. Piper went over big here. He just manned up and played his flute. Dini handled Piper well. Jason is kind of a badass, trying to get off the planet and not worry about his old buddies. Dini does a good job making Rayner look like a fag. Speaking of which, the fucking main heel goes down to a gay guy. Great. At least it was built up well. Art looks solid.

Verdict:
GET IT

Cable and Deadpool #50 Review

Writer: Reily Brown, Fabian Nicieza
Art: Reily Brown
Cover: Skottie Young

Synopsis: We get a recap of the build up to this special bonus sized finale. Deadpool was in the Savage Land on a mission and accidentally teleported some dinosaurs back to NYC while at the same time they got hit by the Venom virus making Venom Dinosaurs. Our first scene finds him and Spider-man fighting some of these dinosaurs and bantering (love a good banter). We see the Agency X folks chilling in the office. Alex is waiting to get some business before he calls in reinforcements for Deadpool. Deadpool is fighting a T-Rex and is getting his ass handed to him before the Mighty Avengers step in and bail him out. Wonder man and Ms Marvel start questioning Irene and Deadpool about what in the blue hell is going on. The rest of the issue consits of them beating up dinosaurs and bantering until they eventually win.


Comments: This was my first issue of Cable and Deadpool and it just happened to be the finale so that is why my synopsis is a bit weak. My first impression is that this well most obviously this comic probably constantly breaks the fourth wall. This comic was also very funny. Full of funny dialog and I would guess if i had read the past issues it would have a lot funnier because of the characters. This comic really left an impression on me as there are few like it since most comics are dark and heavy. The closets mainstream comic to it I think would be what they are trying to do with Spider-man. This is a nice change of pace seeing how sometimes comics are focused more towards telling a story than entertaining you, it is nice to see a comic every now and then thats' sole goal is to just entertain you.

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Catwoman #76

Waking Up On The Wrong Side Of The Universe (Part 2)
Writer: Will Pfeifer
Art: David Lopez

Summary:
We start the issue with Catwoman at gunpoint. Batman is on the other side. Catwoman figures that there is no way Batman would use a gun, and worse yet, he forgot to reload. No way that could be him right? She unmasks him, and it does look like Bruce. Some people surround Bruce, and he tells them to fire at Catwoman, which they did. Now, a Gotham City Blimp shoots at Catwoman, which she ducks and flies into a room, where she meets another Catwoman. We learn the new Catwoman is the most wanted criminal on the planet. She sends 2 large panthers after Selina, which she beats. Selina ends up with a gun to the new Selina's head, and tells her to answer some questions. We find out that the new Catwoman is Selina's sister, Maggie. They brawl some more. Selina gets shot, but it doesn't hurt her for some reason. The GCPD blimp shoots at her again, but again, she is like bulletproof. She figures that she might as well have fun with her newfound power.

Comments:
This was a good issue. I am fairy new to the Catwoman title, but I really enjoy the character. In this issue, she somehow dominates everyone, and has superpowers or something. We are teased with the possibility that she might rule Gotham in the next issues. That is a pretty amazing thought, considering she does a lot of damage being crafty and all. Now she is bulletproof, and all the characters on this earth are retarded. I guess we will see where this story goes, but i enjoyed this issue.

Verdict:
GET IT

Countdown to Final Crisis #10 Review

The Gods Must Be Crazy
Writer: Paul Dini
Art: Scott Kolins

Summary:
Holly and Mary and them break down the door to the dimension, and is confronted with this scary motherfucker. Mary says she will take care of it, and says shazam. We see the Challengers get freaked out by a scary lightning strike. They go investigate. Mary Marvel is back. The Gods say that she has freed them, so they don't hate her now. Harley bitches about how she helped too, and some of the gods give Harley and Holly some powers. We see the Karate Kid fighting a possessed Una. Out of no where Red Robin comes to help Kid, but Kid doesn't want him to hurt Una. Todd tells him to go to hell and leaves. A new OMAC guy kills Kid (i think). He fails to assimilate him, and takes him away for an autopsy. Granny is walking and talking, and gets jumped by the 3 girls. They beat up her guard, but Granny runs off. Granny and them run into some guy we can't see. The guy kills Granny and says the New Gods will be extinct. The Challengers then run into the girls. We see some old guy telling Piper to pipe out a song. He promises him to be the god on Apokolips. Just then, the world shakes. Brother Eye man. Brother Eye. I am not sure, but i think hes a fucking planet.

Comments:
That was a good issue. Countdown is in overdrive right now, and we are sprinting to a finish. Everything is finally coming into place. Last issue, i bitched about how bad the Mary/Holly/Harley storyline was going, but it finally made some sense this week. The best part about this issue is that the loose ends are being tied up. Now Mary and Co. are joined up with the Challengers. Brother Eye man. Brother Eye is Apokolips (I'm guessing, but i am pretty fucking sure). Jason Todd is still doing his thing. We don't know who killed Granny, but thank the Gods (pun) she's dead. I really think we are going to get a great final 9 issues to finish up this title, and be on our way to Final Crisis. Oh Yeah.

Verdict:
GET IT

The Mighty Avengers #9 Review

Writer: Brian Michael Bendis
Artist: Mark Bagley
Inker: Danny Miki

Synopsis: So Doom is chilling in the past, you know, nailing Morgan Le Fay (yeah, hes got game like that). She asks him for a gift and he says he can't because that could mess up time and he takes off and goes back to the future only to find that Tony Stark is getting ready to totally invade his country. Tony asks Ares (Marvel's favorite bigot) what the plan is. His response is an awkward silence followed by instructions to the team. He tells them get out of the plane and goes 9-11 on Doom's castle (to soon? please comment). He jumps out and the Mighty Avengers start going to work on Doom's army. Three splash pages later Doom and Iron Man stare each other down. They start to go armor to armor when Doom brings out the magic and starts winning the fight. They end up falling into the time machine and are sent to some mysterious dimension along with Sentry who tried to bail out Tony. The Mighty Avengers regroup and try to figure out what the fuck happened. Tony is waking up in a comic book world I guess, where Doom is standing over Stark about to just wail on him (he swore on his mom's soul).

Comments: Bendis's run on Mighty Avengers has hit a major snag since that awesome beginning (buy that trade). It has hit a snag and lately has been one rushed issue after another. The venom virus storyline got murdered and it appears that Bendis is just trying to get ready for Secret Invasion. It seems that the delays hurt the way the storyline was supposed to develop so he has just been rushing things to catch up. That being said, this was a very pretty issue to look out. It was nice to read but you won't remember it in a week. It looks really nice though, I can't stress that enough. The thought bubbles are getting old since they aren't saying anything funny but things that they should say out loud, in other words they are getting pretty useless. The comic does have moments but it earns a

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Iron Man Director of S.H.E.I.L.D. #26 Review

Written by: Daniel and Charles Knauf
Drawn by: Roberto De La Torre
Cover by: Gerald Parel

Synopsis: Last time we left our protagonist he was about to throwdown with arch nemesis the Mandarin who had this wacky plan to unleash an Extremis bio-weapon which would kill every person who was less than quality. Tony called the proverbial shenanigans and busted in to lay down the law. That's the backstory to what has been going on lately in Iron Man. We are at the SHIELD carrier where Commander Maria Hill is debating with her crew to follow Tony's orders. Dugan who is playing the role of the wise old man is rallying for Hill to just follow Tony's orders. They go back and forth for a bit about Tony's sanity until he brings up the book and how you got to break the law sometimes. Tony and the Mandarin are still fighting. We go back to SHIElD where they are going over the plan which is basically nuke the place and have a black hole take care of the radiation. The Mandarin and Stark are going all DBZ on each other when the nuke is launched. The Mandarin books it and leaves Stark to deal with some of his lackeys. Stark beats them starts to cheese it, the nuke has gone off and hes getting sucked in.

Comments: This was a great issue. For one thing the art was excellent, the fight scenes looked awesome with all the beams going off on each other. The dialog was solid as well. The cliffhanger was weak though, I mean come on, who actually thinks Tony will get sucked into the blackhole, anyone? Yeah, it was a weak cliffhanger. Another petty complaint was the way the opening scene played out. The whole playing things by the book was a bit lame. Isn't the whole point of SHIELD to deal with some issues the book doesn't cover? I just didn't buy into that opening scene. Other than that it was an awesome issue with fantastic art which is why it earns a

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Hulk #2 Review

The Smoking Gun
Writer: Jeph Loeb
Art: Ed McGuinness

Summary:
We start on the SHIELD hellicarrier, where Tony and Hill are talking about the murder weapon in the Hulk scene was a SHIELD issued one. Suddenly, big red hands grab the She-Hulk and decks her out. We learn the Hulk got into the power system on the ship, and Tony goes after him. Tony goes to check on a prisoner, and the red Hulk attack. Tony gets his ass kicked, while saying that the Hulk is just an animal. An animal doesn't need a gun, so that logic doesn't register. Hulk throws a plane at Tony, and jumps off. Tony's power starts to shut down, but She-Hulk grabs him before he falls. The hellicarrier is on its way down to crush New York City. Tony sends the ship towards New Jersey instead (LOL). We go to this guy that gets pushed by the Hulk, then turns into a Blue Monster.

Comments:
This was a below-average read. Loeb really hasn't found his groove with this title yet. I think he writes a terrible Iron-Man. He made Tony bitch about losing his ship like 4 separate times in this book. Usually, Tony doesn't worry about that kind of stuff, and actually cares about more important things then losing an investment. Bad call by my boy Jeph. Also, the Hulk doesn't do anything in this comic, except go over as an unstoppable monster. We didn't get an explanation for what motive he would come on a SHIELD hellicarrier and throw planes around and leave. Even if you explain that later, it sounds dumb. The end was retarded as well. Now we got a blue Hulk looking thing running around. If you are into monsters and don't appreciate Tony Stark, you will like this title. McGuinness does provide some fine art though.

Verdict:
FORGET IT

Green Lantern Corps #21 Review

Written: Sterling Gates
Art and Cover: Nelson

Synopsis: The Lantern formerly known as Boodikka is helping a Lantern (who looks like Santa Clause and from where on out will be known as Secret Weapon) take on some Manhunters. The fight is going on and Secret Weapons ring is about to run out of power when the Lantern formerly known as Boodikka takes them out by doing some computer hacking shit. She calls out Secret Weapon for letting a Sincestro Corp Lantern get away (at this point he loses his nickname of Secret Weapon and is now Santa again). She tells Santa to look for his brother who is a Sincestro Corp Lantern. Back at the Lantern Cave (Lantern HQ) some Lost Lanterns are talking about the upcoming trial and whether they should tell Boodikka about it since she sold out and became an Alpha Lantern. She has a flashback about her at home and how she kicked ass without a ring back in the day. The smurfs tell her that her sister has gone heel and they need someone to investigate. She goes home and starts looking for her sister attacked by rebels or something, I don't know this issue sucked cock.

Comments: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

FUCK IT

Booster Gold #0 Review

Written by: Geoff Johns, Jeff Katz
Art by: Dan Jurgens, Norm Rapmund

Synopsis: It seems like just yesterday that we were at issue #6 but now here we are at 0. The next arch is about the Zero Hour crossover that took place back in the day and how Booster saved the world without no one knowing. We got Booster, Ted Kord, and the various other Blue Beetles chilling in the time machine. The future Blue Beetle points at Ted and tells him he is supposed to dead. The Blue Beetles and Booster are sitting there talking when they spot Parallax and his minion who have just taken out the old Justice League (Superman had hair back then old). After an awkward pause Jamie asks if they saw us. One wisecrack later they are being attacked but manage to fend them off and land in Booster's time. It just so happens they land right when Booster's dad is telling him to throw the game against Ohio State (who went on to make the national championship game and get beaten down again). Booster decides to not stop himself from throwing the game but chooses to save his sister in the near future (just not now). They need a new time machine so they go back to the superhero museum to steal Rip's time machine again (thank you time travel). All of a sudden they get attacked by the security robot cops featuring Skeets. They escape and manage to go to their respective times. Booster and Ted are deciding what to eat and notice that Rip's lab is trashed and oh, an army of OMACs are coming to kick some ass.

Comments: Booster Gold is another title that comes from Johns. For those of you who don't know him (shame) he is the writer who is basically been carrying DC for the past couple of years. Johns and Katz work well together and it shows by how spot on the dialog is. It is quality stuff. Another thing is how Johns and Katz manage to just leave clues to where the title is going like the hint that Mr. Mind's spawn will probably be a big villain in the near future. This issue did leave a lot to be desired though. The problem with time travel is that it is very difficult to not leave plot holes and I'm sure that will eventually catch up. I am intrigued by the motives of the 25th century Blue Beetle and also how Booster will save his sister. This issue was so slow though that it almost gets a skim it, almost but it is worth the wisecracks alone so this issue earns a

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Punisher War Journal #16 Review

The Survivor's Guild
Writer: Matt Fraction
Art: Howard Chaykin

Summary:
We go to a room with the Guild, and a guy named Martin is talking about how the Punisher burned over 78% of his body, so now he is in bandages. A guy comes in and tells Martin he has what he needs, but Martin just leaves. He goes back to his house and his wife bitches at him. The Tinkerer comes in and gives him his identity. He asks why, and Martin says he wants to buy a gun to kill the Punisher. He goes out and comes back, and the wife knows about him wanting to buy a gun. He unmasks himself and buys the gun. The wife bitches at Marty some more, telling him he is not a killer, and he doesn't have the balls and what not. She tells him to check on the snake because she thinks its dead. Marty just throws it out. We find his real intention was to kill a pimp who treats his hoes badly. He bails out, and Punisher comes out of nowhere and kills the pimp. Marty gives Punisher the gun, picks up a new snake, and goes home. He gives his wife the snake. The end.

Comments:
That was a good read. Matt Fraction is a really good writer. I don't really read Punisher War Journal (I'll start though), but the issue flowed really well. It takes some time getting used to the way it's chronologically organized, but after a while it just flows real nice. You have to respect a writer who can make a good issue without really using the main character. Punisher only made a cameo in this issue, which was centered around Marty. We got to see how fragile his mindset is, and how he deals with things like his bitch of a wife, and his burns. He is just a guy that got fucked up by the Punisher, and now he is just screwed for the rest of his life. His wife cares more about a snake than him. The art looks like Immortal Iron Fist, so i guess it appropriate for this title.

Verdict:
GET IT

The Amazing Spiderman #550 Review

The Menace of... Menace
Writer: Marc Guggenheim
Art: Salvador Larroca

Summary:
We start the issue with the Blue Shield trying to demask Spidey because he is breaking the registration act. A glider distracts Shield, and Spidey goes after the Goblin. Peter tries to un-mask the Goblin, but that set off an electrical charge. Goblin tells him not to mess with him, and gives Parker a cut in his stomach. We go to Jackpot, who helps up Spidey. She says her name is Sara Ehret. They check out the Menace's (new name) hideout, where they find blueprints to Apollo Theater. We go to Peter, who calls Lily and asks if she was with Harry last night, which she was. We check in on JJ, who is yelling at people. Marla doesn't tell him about the sale of the Bugle. We go to this guy who wants to sue Spidey. They say that he can file a John Doe suit, and wait for him to slip up. We go to Mr. Bennett, who says that he doesn't want to use his pictures of the Menace because of bad lighting. He then rips on JJ because he uses any picture he can get. We go to Peter, who is using Betty's computer because he doesn't have one. He gets the name of the guy who did the reporting on the Spider-Tracer murder. He meets Palone, and says that the tracer is an older model. Palone shows him a map of 5 killings, each having a tracer on the victims. He says he is holding him over for questioning. We go to the Apollo Theater, and the Menace interrupts a political debate. Back to Spidey. He sees the explosions at the Apollo, and is about to leave, but gets surrounded by the police.

Comments:
This was an allright issue. The main plus here is we get introduced to a new villain in Menace. He looks like a gray Goblin to me, but I am sure the writers will give him distinguishable attributes. I don't really like Larroca's art here. The guy who is with Slott is wayyyy better. I am not really sure what is up with Jackpot. She is way too shady for my liking. Probably the best part of this issue is the revelation that Spiderman is a suspect in 6 homicides, because someone had his tracers and placed them on murder victims. It will be interesting to see where that goes. The issue was allright, but nothing you need to get.

Verdict:
SKIM IT

Countdown to Final Crisis #11 Review

Eye of the Beholder
Writer: Paul Dini
Art: Mike Norton

Summary:
We start the issue with Karate Kid saying how Brother Eye has transported him into some other planet. We go to the Challengers, and Red Robin is grilling Atom for being useless. Then he disappears. Jason is just slinging through town (Batman style), and says that he can't trust anyone after Bob turned on him. He then approaches Brother Eye. Karate Kid is doing his thing (karate of course), and he says he doesn't know why Brother Eye brought him there. Back to Red Robin. He is talking about how Brother Eye found himself here on this planet, then goes to it to try to get back to Gotham and his Earth. We go to Trickster, who is thinking suicide, but someone tells him that he will decide when he gets to die. We go to Holly and them, who are trying to escape the Granny or whatever. Granny sends like evil bitches her way, who get destroyed eventually. And then they decide to go kill Granny. We go to Olsen, who is on some planet to get backup. Backup turns out to be men in skirts. We end the issue with Val trying to get out, and then an OPAC comes to fight him.

Comments:
Countdown is allright now. It isn't dreadful anymore. I had mixed feelings about this issue. I liked what Dini did with Jason. He gave him an identity now as the Red Robin. He totally looks like Batman here, with the mannerisms and thinking like a detective. What really killed this issue for me was everything with Holly and the Granny and the fucking Stomper or whatever the hell. Stupid shit like this really kills an issue. Worst yet, it took up a ton of room too. I just want Holly to go away because she sucks, and is written terribly. The Karate Kid stuff was solid, and i guess it is important to the story. Assimilating Val's virus into the city would be pretty terrible. The thing that bugs me is that this is supposed to lead up to the greatest crossover in DC history. Countdown is ok, not anything great. I just really hope we get something different and seperate from Countdown when we get to Final Crisis.

Verdict:
SKIM IT

Wolverine #62 Review

Writer: Jason Aaron
Artist: Ron Garney
Cover: Ron Garney Jason Keith
Color: Jason Keith

Synopsis: Wolverine sure is busy post Messiah Complex from traveling Europe, fighting purifiers in North Dakota, chasing Mystique in Afghanistan, and even being trapped in space with the rest of the Astonishing X-men. Our story begins with Wolverine getting roughed up in a Mexican prison during 1921. They tie him up and he meets Mystique in Mexican prison. They are about to face the firing squad when we cut back to the present where Wolverine is approaching some Afghani village. He threatens a kid asking where Mystique is and he kills some lady who he suspects to be her (it isn't or this would be an extremely short story). Another flashback takes us to Muir Island where Cyclops tells him to bring her down (Cyclops is ordering hits now, it's how he rolls). Wolverine decides to humor Scott and go along with his request. He says give me 9 hours and rolls out. Wolverine is now in Mosque where he calls out the imam who happens to be Mystique. The people in the Mosque comes to the aid of Mystique while he runs away and blows up the Mosque (not cool man, not cool). Wolverine saves as many people as he can as Mystique gets away. We go back to Mexico where Wolverine had managed to beat the firing squad and save him and Mystique then they walk off into the desert. Back int he present Wolverine is hitting the dusty trail pretty hard and finds the body of the woman he had killed earlier. We see the Taliban loading up and Wolverine confronts Mystique who had framed him for murder.

Comments: This was a really fun issue. The way this started off it looks like Wolverine will be one of the better post Messiah Complex spin offs. The twist in this issue was great about how Mystique framed Wolverine. The dialog was spot on and the art was just fantastic. Few series do Wolverine justice (not even his own but now that has changed). They really use Wolverines extensive history to make what could have seemed like a generic storyline and spiced it up by adding a little twist that Mystique and Wolverine used to roll back in the day. I'm curious to now where they joined up because it was before Magneto and the Brotherhood's time. The setting also makes a big impact as it is a nice change of pace. Mystique was never a good face and she will probably have to be the main event heel for the X-men and I think she is capable. Anyway fun issue, good art, has all the makings of a

GET IT

X-Force #1: Angels and Demons (Part 1) Review

Cover: Clayton Crain
Writer: Christopher Yost, Craig Kyle
Pencils: Clayton Crain
Colorer: Clayton Crain
Lettered: VC-Cpry Petit

Synopsis: So part of post Messiah Complex is all the X-men spin-offs. They have a new divided we stand gimmick meant to justify the adding of all the new titles. X-Force can be best described as the X-men black ops and this debut issue helps support this. But enough of my banter, the synopsis is upon us. We open up in Colorado with Wolverine chilling on the porch. Cyclops joins him and tells him about the SHIELD infiltration by the purifiers. They stole some super weapon from SHIELD so Cyclops decides to be reasonable and start a kill force to take them out. Warpath is burying his body and swears a blood oath (the only oath worth swearing [pinky being second] {heh the parentheses keep coming}) to avenge his little buddy. Cy tells Logan that X-23 is already signed up. Logan pops him, says he has no right to make her kill again. Cy introduces Rahne to the force and they take off to the evil lair of the purifiers (North Dakota, awww yeah its on). Logan gives everyone a last minute pep talk about how once you go black (ops) you don't go back and this will change you forever (btw their uniforms are black which is why this jokes on so many levels). So the purifiers are hating in their layer and show they had a robot that told the future which is how they knew about the baby. They attach a head to the robot and it comes to life and looks like a bad ass. The X-Force bust in and starts going balls to the walls just killing people. The fighting winds down then the token disfigured leader of the purifiers captures Rahne and says he will shoot her if they don't stand down. X-23 calls shenanigans and rushes two lackeys when the purifier leader seemingly pulls the trigger and ends the issue with a BLAM (the new guns go BLAM not BANG)!


Commentary: This issue was really interesting. It puts an interesting spin on the X-men. Usually the main fear of regular people is that mutants would use their powers to do something like forming an unstoppable kill force but at the same time you can see how their situation calls for certain things like this. I enjoyed how Wolverine came across. Lately Wolverine has become just a background character but it's good to see him in the spotlight again. Cyclopes may have been stepping up lately but he seriously needs a check and Wolverine is the only one capable of giving it to him. I also liked how he warned everyone about becoming a killer and how doing what they will do will change them forever. It is in his character to basically take the burden of others and he doesn't want others to go down his road which is mighty big of him. I also enjoy how this picks up on the purifiers storyline which I think is the biggest snub in Messiah Complex since it just kind of disappeared. The art though is a bit rough at the start but manages to pick up. The manner of killing seemed a bit too much and it doesn't make sense that a stealth team with knives has such messy kills, logistics wise it doesn't stand. This was a decent issue but though it seems a bit out of character and the purifiers are a threat that need the X-men as a whole. They have earned the full force of the X-men and this does seem like a job.


Verdict:
almost GET IT but earns a strong SKIM IT

X-Factor #28 Review

Aftermath
Writer: Peter David
Art: Pablo Raimondi

Summary:
We start the issue with Theresa confessing her sins at church. Here she says that she got knocked up with Jamie's child. We go to a scene with Rhane and Jamie. Jamie and his clones bitch about Rahne bailing out on Layla and them. Rahne reveals that Tryp Senior showed her that she killed both of them on their wedding night. We see Rictor in mutant town walking around. He think he sees Layla, but it turns out to be some child prostitute. Rictor somehow gets into a fight with the prostitute's pimps, and gets his ass kicked. Guido comes in and breaks it up. We go to a scene with Monet and Rahne, who tells her that she is leaving. Monet gets kind of mad and thats about all there. We go to Guido who calls Jamie, but he just appears out of no where. He goes to the power plant to "beat up some guys". Jamie breaks into a Purifiers meeting, and says how lost he is without Layla. More Purifiers come in, and 4 Jamies look for a fight. He fights them while commenting that his compassion is the only thing that seperates him from his enemies. He wonders what will be the thing that breaks that compassion. We go to Monet and Theresa in a bar, where Theresa tells Monet about the baby. Monet tells her to get an abortion, but Theresa tells her that every life is important. We end the issue with Rictor spilling his feelings about Mutant Town to who he thought was Jamie, but it was only a dupe. He says that no one listens to him except Rahne, and then he goes to her room to figure out she left.

Comments:
That was a good issue. Mo says that Bendis is the master of dialogue, but i daresay David is. X-Factor continues to be one of the best-written comic books on the market today. David did a great job showing the tension and lack of hope that is going on to the various members of X-Factor. Theresa is having Jamie's kid, Rahne is leaving, Madrox is pissed, Rictor is fucked up, and Layla is missing. David keeps Layla a focus in this book through narration (you know I love narration). David gives Jamie a powerful voice in this book through his narration. This was just a great issue to start X-Factor's post Messiah arc (much better than Uncanny). Personally, X-Factor is my favorite X-Men series, and i strongly recommend it. The art is a real eye-pleaser.
Verdict:
a slightly overrated OWN IT

Take Mo #1

Double Review Goodness

We will kick off the first double review post ever in the history of this blog. You might want to breath because once this ride starts it doesn't stop, all two reviews. But before we begin this I feel a memorable quotes segment is needed. Detective Comics had a moment that made you say DAMN!!!

Villain: Let's go, Bats! The carpenter will cut you down to size!
Batman: Seriously?

You can't beat that moment, especially the look on Batman's face, the moment really came through. As for the second memorable quote of the day it comes from Moon Knight. It was just a quip.

Tony: I need this like I need another hole in my heart.

Just a subtle quip that jokes on Tony's origins, if more superheroes had jokes like this (Batman: I need this like I need dead parents, Spiderman: I need this like I need another dead uncle) comics would have a lot less tension. But enough of this douchebaggery (Mission Hill, look it up) let me get to my reviews.


Moon Knight 15 Review
Every so often comes a Batman knockoff that we all love. If there was ever a true Rated R superstar it would Moon Knight, the man is not stable. I would have loved to be at the production meeting that came up with Moon Knight, guys let us get an emotionally disturbed rich man and make him beat up on people (similar to batman). The difference is, with a Moon Knight he doesn't have the film noir aspect of Batman, a Moon Knight mystery is how do I pound the crap out of this man, ok but now I need to cease with the malarkey (Mission Hill again) and get to the summary. We start with Tony watching MK going to work on this thug and wondering how in holy hell did this quack get a registration card. We see Mark boxing with Frenchie and his physical therapist who is also Frenchies bf. Mark accidentally breaks Rob's nose. We see some super criminal getting released and some weird guy who avoids getting hit by the train. The criminal tries to be legit while seeing his P.O. gets rolled, Marc just had sex with Marlene, they fight, Frenchie considers offing himself, some dude convinces the ex con to go back into crime, Marlene leaves then comes back and sees Marc trying on the face of the man he killed. Issue ends there.

Comments: This was a solid issue in a week of crap this one stood out. It runs away with the Adam Copeland award. This was a really solid issue. The art especially feels right for this title since it is all about moral ambiguity and when you cross certain lines. The story looks good and the transition from writers went really smoothly. Certainly this is a sleeper in Marvel and you certainly should consider catching up because the future looks bright (ironically enough).

GET IT

Detective Comics 841 Review

Dective Comics by Dini is a good title. He wrote the fantastic Emmy Award winning Batman the animated series and does well in his transition to the comic medium. He has the unique one shot format that works really well and he writes a beast mode Joker (see Slay Ride and Death in the City if you need proof). Anyway, Wayne is chilling in this fashion show and decides to flake when Mad Hatter and his Wonderland crew decide to rob the place. They manage to make an impression before the cops chase them off. Batman does some recon and manages to figure out they are drafting crooks in twos to their gang so he hits up some low time thugs and gets the dirt. He tracks down two low level crooks and figures out where the Mad Hatter is stationed. Turns out that the Hatter was under mind control from two lonely members of his gang. Batman proceeds to layeth the smackethdown on the candyasses. He calls Gordon up, they all go to Arkham and Hatter gets his revenge.

Comments: This was a weak filler issue, not quality at all. It wasn't all bad seeing as it has probably the best moment of the week (quote post, that cracked me up). Dini is hopefully getting back on track and will start putting up some classy stories. But for now i will be petty and hate (tough job, it's hard out there for a hater). This was filler, you aren't missing much.
May the bat gods have mercy on me but this issue gets a

FUCK IT

Take Tro #2

The Cave is very sorry for no reviews this week. This was a terrible follow-up to our great debut week. We promise to get back on track next week and deliver some great reviews and critiques. I didn't read everything yet. I am still hoping to get around to reading Spider-Man and Countdown. I have read some things that really impressed me however. Let's take a look at my top 5 for this week:

1. The Twelve- I missed the first issue, but i knew what it was about. This is JMS' new project, and i must say, it impressed the hell out of me. The characters are really well done, and we got some great narration, and hopefully we are in for a great year-long miniseries.
2. Moon Knight- He didn't really slaughter anyone in this issue, but it was still a good read.
3. Silver Surfer- In Thy Name - I had no idea what was going on, but if u just gather all the narration together, you can read it like a book, thats how strong it was. This was the end of Spurrier's 2nd Silver Surfer Regime (He did Requiem before this), and i can't really judge it that well because I have read like half of it.
4. Uncanny X-Men- Down issue for me, simply for the fact that nothing happened. The plus that came out of it was that Brubaker continued to maturate Scott.

Worst book of the week that I have read was Nightwing. Now it probally could have been the best issue of the week, but I got bored after like 5 pages (he was a freaking tour guide), so i quit reading and banned the book.

Moments of the Week:








































































Next week is better with X-Factor and the debuting X-Force. We will definitely post reviews.

Take Tro #1

This really was a good week in comics. The comics that were supposed to be good delivered. Cap, Batman, and Green Lantern gave us good reads this week, following up with Countdown and Daredevil. Of the books I have read this week, here is my top 5.

1. Captain America- debut issue for Bucky, and my boy Bru gave us a fantastic version of Cap that will stick around for years on end.
2. Batman- I love Batman, and this issue delved into the history of the Dark Knight in a great way.
3. Green Lantern- I still say this is a filler arc, but it is still really fun to read.
4. Daredevil- I love Brubaker, and he fills up 40% of my list for good reason. Brubaker makes Daredevil a real badass, but keeps the story moving.
5. Countdown- surprisingly not bad, and Jason Todd has an identity now.

Worst I read this week is probably Ultimate Spider-Man. My collegue liked it, but it was just average to me. Bendis handles dialog very well, but nothing happened in this issue. Magneto is in the next one, so that should be good.

My favorite moments of the week:















































Next week has some good books, but not many. We are treated to more Brubaker in Uncanny, and I am sure Justice Society of America will be good. The Cave will post some reviews to help you decide what to buy (wink wink).

Superbowl

Usually Sports God takes care of this, but I've been given the go ahead to report on this. This was the greatest upset in Superbowl History. There was a lot of things going on (Wes my boy Welker) and you had the Giants D stepping up. Anyway long story short, is this the greatest upset in all of sports. Sound off. I believe it is, the most prolific offense in history vs the greatest underdogs in our age. This by far trumps anything we have ever seen. Any thoughts.

Awards

Awards:
Here we are, at the first ever awards of this prestigious blogs. A lot of planning goes into this and we don't make this stuff in a minute (be cool). So this week we have the previledge and the sincere honor of giving out both awards, The Adam Copeland and the JBL. The JBL is given out rarely so this week it is an extreme honor that both are given out. We will begin with the great Adam Copeland.

The Adam Copeland: Captain America #34
This goes to Captain America. This issue was the beginning of the Bucky era and so far it is looking pretty good. If Bucky can be a successful Captain Steve Rodgers might stay dead (doubt it, you gotta look at the spread). This was a nice issue that keeps moving the plot. It also sets up those subtle sub-plots such as how people will react to Bucky as Cap or how the Skull plans to deal with a Cap that is much more liberal when it comes out to handing out lethal punishment than Steve. This issue is Rated R Superstar certified.

The John Bradshaw Layfield Award: Bucky "the man" Barnes

In a classic sweep, Bucky wins the JBL award. No character over the past year has received as big a push as Bucky. Iron Man was a fine candidate but he was in a higher position and didn't have to travel as far as Bucky. Jason Todd the other candidate is currently stuck in Countdown and he and Bucky are about on the same pace but Todd right now Bucky is more mature and know that he is Captain America he is at the big dance. The best analogy would be the Eli Manning, Phillip Rivers, and Ben Rothelsburger draft class. Bucky is like Eli (good Eli) and Jason is the Phillip Rivers, he is maturing just not quite as fast. I digress though, this is Bucky's award and it is his time to shine.

The Bigs: DC
Continuing our theme of DC vs Marvel, this week went to the DCU. Marvel had the highlights of the week (the Kobes) but overall DC won the race. Johns and Grant both put out stellar reads this week, Countdown doesn't blow, all and all a good week for DC. In all honestly though, this is probably the only week DC will win out the month because they just sprint here, put out all their best title, Marvel actually does a better job of spacing out their titles which might have to do something with them outselling DC (pay attention here) but the petty stops here (not really), DC won this week and congrats to all the people over at DC (Marvel too) who put in the hard work to give us these wonderful titles.

"Rated R" Honorable Mentions:
Batman
Green Lantern

JBL Honorable Mentions:
JBL (Himself, the wrestling god)
Jason Todd (Hang tough kid)
Batman (his stock may have peaked but still don't hate)

The Mighty Avengers #8 Review

Cover Mark Bagley
Writer Brian Michael Bendis
Pencils Mark Bagley
Colored by Justin Ponsor
Lettered by Dave Lanphear

Synopsis: We start with Wasp looking over matching suits for the avengers when Pryme comes in. There is some mild sexual tension and he gives her a formula that lets her go from being small to giant. The venoms are going off and the Avengers charge. Basically the everyone is Venom, including the new avengers, some of the group (Sentry, Wonderman, Stark, Ms Marvel, and Ares) are immune but the rest change. Stark synthesizes a cure, considers who is and isn't a Skrull, and wonders about their motive. They beat the Venom virus, find out where it came from, and go to invade Dr. Doom's country.

Comments: This was catchup. They wanted to get to get caught up with New Avengers due to the delays caused by the (brilliant but late) artist before Bagley. One thing that spiked my interest is Dr. Doom. He has been up to something (the shifty bastard) and it probably has to do with Secret Invasion. I'm looking forward to it honestly more than Final Crisis because this event is much more original (for comics, in movies they do this all the time ie invasion of the body snatchers), but i like the idea that superheroes are being replaced. This conspiracy stuff really pikes my interest. Stark also came off pretty cool, I think 08 is going to be his year, sure we have the up and coming Bucky but Stark right now, he has become the workhorse of Marvel. Steve Rodgers is dead, Spider-man has effectively been taken out, so now Stark has stepped up and in a big way.

Verdict:
SKIM IT

Black Adam #6 Review

The Dark Age (Conclusion)
Writer: Peter J. Tomasi
Art: Doug Mahnke

Summary:
We start in Antarctica, where we see Black Adam just destroy soldiers. He thinks he has them beat, but all of a sudden someone shoots him. He is pissed and confused that he actually got shot, and the Justice League shows up to stop the soldiers, while Black Adam escapes. Black Adam gets on a train and says its time to finish the final part of his journey. Elsewhere, Mr. J is checking up on his project with Camp David, who tells him that everything will be taken care of. Adam decides to check out Fawcett City. He goes to a cafe area, where he orders up a Chocolate Egg Cream, but suddenly lightning strikes and he is Black Adam again. We go to the Tower of Doom, where Adam has all the pieces of the amulet to bring back his wife. We learn that he changed to Black Adam because chocolate egg cream was the magic word. So the transformation fails, and his wife is still dead. Adam gets pissed and threatens the sorcerer, who tells him that it is because of him that it failed. He should not have changed back and forth from Teth to Black Adam. Black Adam leaves, not killing the sorcerer. The sorcerer then reveals that that body who Adam was trying to bring back wasn't his wife's. He then goes to resurrect the wife, and they walk away into some other dimension. We see Adam in his hideout banging against the walls, and the final picture is him crying over a picture of him and his wife.

Comments:
That was the end of the Dark Age. I am not sure if this title is going to stop or not, but i hope it doesn't. Black Adam is a very complicated character. He is very inhuman and cold, yet he has the ability to love. He does all of the horrible things for his wife. This issue ends with Adam not getting his wife back, even though she is back alive with the sorcerer. This is a very tragic end to this series, and really puts Black Adam over as a face, after being a big heel in 52 (apparently, because i didn't read 52). The art and dialog was very good, and overall i was satisfied with this miniseries.

Verdict:
GET IT